the contradictions of understanding

i was clearly led to go right, so i went left
i was led to be still; i frantically went on a search
i was led to be patient, so i rushed to find an answer

i got lost in a snow storm, while it was 89 degrees
freezing from the snow, on a hot summer day
lost and alone, in a room filled with people
i ran from despair, walking directly into it

and found the same mistakes i didn't make before
awaiting my arrival
proving that running from it - takes you closer to it

while being still, i went out for a month, one day
singing a song that the world heard - through my silence
i saw no one, and met a man
i married this man, that i never knew
he loved me to despair
and ignored me to greatness

he gave me a lifetime of joy with the smallest contribution -
my son being the magnificent result
i have not seen him in years
yet i look into his eyes every day

i gazed at the stars, while shading my eyes from the sun
and cleared my mind while pondering life
realizing that i knew nothing,
while knowing everything i needed to know
realizing that i HAD nothing
while thankful that i had it all.

the contradictions of understanding.

© TonyaC2010